Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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