I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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