we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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