I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
