I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
