when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
