Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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