he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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