Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
