I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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