STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Randomize