im so drunk with asians
where?
always
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
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