Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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