john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
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