after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize