Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Randomize
