I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
grandma shit on top of the toilet
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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