shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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