we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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