Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
