Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
Non-Jews are for practice
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
