i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize