There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
