Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Randomize