I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
