She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
