remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Randomize