I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
