he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize