Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
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