If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
