I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Randomize
