Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
