we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
