She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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