I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
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