i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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