Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize