everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
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