How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
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