Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
