I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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