at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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