That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
