i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
