Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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