he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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