Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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