My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Randomize
