I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
vagina is talking i cant
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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